Cute Former O.C. Star Tries Avant-Garde On For Size

It wasn’t so long ago that any Rachel Bilson related news — Looks, she’s walking her dog!  — would have snagged bond font headlines, but lately her star seems to have fallen to the depths of Mischa Barton’s pathetic blog posts for attention.  So you may be surprised to learn that the former O.C. star is engaged to another former hot Hollywood property, Hayden Christensen.  You know, the guy who starred in the Star Wars prequels and ruined one of the greatest movie sagas of all time.  Thanks, bro.   Frankly, we were shocked that he put a ring on it since we would have bet money that his preference was more of the Brokeback Mountain variety.

But since he’s not exactly being flooded with scripts, we can kind of understand why Hayden would ask his sweetie to parade around looking like Chewbacca’s love child to remind people that he used to have a career.  Cheesy, but desperate times.  And a sandwich board saying “Please Hire Hayden” would have been kind of hard to walk in.  Because Rachel couldn’t possibly have looked at all the options in her closet and just randomly decided, “yes, this dress that looks like spare Muppet parts is PERFECT!,” right?  RIGHT!?  Even Tina Knowles, who wouldn’t know good taste if it came right up to her and introduced itself, would be like, “Honey, no.”

Which is a shame because from the knees down, Rachel looks quite sane.  Especially the shoes, like these Report Signature t-straps.  Lord, if this outfit is what she throws on for daily wear, her wedding dress is going to be a doozy.  Maybe  something like a straight jacket with fringe number from Gareth Pugh.  In white, of course.  Gotta keep some things traditional.

And, not to start any rumors or anything, but Rachel looks a bit . . . wide in the stomach area, no?

By ShoeMinx Fashionista Paige Muller

Ryan’s One Set of Lips Away From Smooching Javier Bardem

Evidently Vicky Cristina Barcelona star Scarlett Johansson has re-thought her “monogamy is a weird thing, because, let’s face it, we’re f-cking animals,” Cosmo comment.

The Hollywood stalkerazzi don’t usually miss much, but even they were shocked when word came out that Scarlett and Definitely, Maybe’s Ryan Reynolds had jumped the broom and gotten hitched after just over a year of dating.

How did the ridiculously hot couple manage to keep details of their nuptials under wraps when super couples like Beyonce and JayZ and Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony can’t?  Evidently the long lens of celebrity photogs doesn’t extend to the wilderness of Vancouver Island (camera, check; film, check; passport, oooops).  And of course, having the frenzied media pack focused on Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake’s rumored to be imminent journey into wedded bliss is a useful cover.

With a small circle of friends and family, the new Mr. and Mrs. Reynolds combined a backpacking weekend with a wedding ceremony at the Clayoquot Wilderness Resort, a luxurious outpost of 20 canvas tents that caters to nature lovers. Somehow we can’t imagine Ryan’s former fiancé Alanis Morissette enjoying roughing it - unless it’s to scratch her nails down a cheating love’s back.

No word on whether or not ScaryAn said “yes, to the dress” Stella McCartney had designs on creating for the occasion. Stella, who made Madonna’s dress for her marriage to director Guy Ritchie, joked, tongue firmly in cheek, about what she had in mind for the bodacious bride, “You know, some kind of dodgy, black thing. Latex! Latex for Scarlett!”

Plans are afoot to throw a larger celebration for the couple. ShoeMinx wants all the pomp of a big Hollywood wedding and pictures of the blonde bombshell with her signature red lips!  Frankly, after envying her lip-locking libidinous roles with Aussie treat Eric Bana in The Other Boleyn Girl and sensual like-water-for-chocolate hunk Javier Bardem, we feel owed a bit of couture eye candy to sate our celebrity fixation.

While we wait for the PR-approved wedding snaps to appear in People, let’s celebrate the happy couple’s blessed union - and the fact that Justin Timberlake is still technically available - with these rockin’ retro Stella McCartney heels.  So they’re not the typical wedding-white, but our girl Scarlett has never struck us as the traditional “The Knot” type anyway. Besides how could you resist?  These shoes are impossibly gorgeous.

Posted By ShoeMinx All-Star Paige Muller